The thing no one likes to talk about but its real weight

OK holy long blog post title but its the truth. I cringe at this, I struggle with this, I work on it.

I never struggled with my weight in high school. I was beyond active,volleyball, basketball, track, and dance. I could eat whatever I wanted and sometimes lose weight. Enter my 20's the game changed but I adjusted my eating habits and sprinkled in some working out and maintained.
Then a life change. Michael and I moved into our house together. We under went major construction which meant no kitchen for 3 months. So if you couldn't cook it in a microwave or eat it uncooked it didn't happen in our house. We ordered out constantly and from April until June I gained 25 pounds!!! I had a wedding dress to fit into so I started to walk daily and dropped 10 pounds in a little under 2 months but that still put me up 15 pounds. My wedding dress still fit so I was OK and had the most beautiful wedding day ever.

Then when we got back from the honeymoon I started a new job and put on 15 more pounds because of all the pot lucks that they held at work. So now I'm up 30 pounds. In June of 2010 I put my nose to the grindstone and started biking or walking everyday. I lost 20 pounds and was happy with my weight for the first time in over a year. In January of 2012 I decided to get my booty back and joined a gym and became obsessed with the high of a good workout. I got back to my 21 year old weight and was fitting in to clothes that at one time I could not get over my rump.

Then it happened I got knocked up by my hubby. I kept up light walking on the treadmill and prenatal yoga until week 11 when I started to bleed. I went to the doctor and they discovered a tear. My baby was fine but the tear was pretty serious I was put on restriction and until 20 weeks. At my 20 week the tear was almost healed but I was still not taken off restriction. This killed me and I got huge. Fast forward to March 19th and much to my suprise Baby Smith was 10 pounds 4 ounces!!!! I mean I was carrying around a giant. So here is the honest part I gained wait for it 98 pounds during my pregnancy. I know I know holy crap right???? When I went in on March 18th I was up 98 pounds from my pre pregnancy weight. A lot was water weight because the last month of my pregnancy had a problem with my kidneys and water retention but still. I was a whale.

Now 5 months post partum most of my swelling has gone down not quite all of it in my midsection (doc says could take 9 months) and I'm only 35 pounds from my pre pregnancy weight. Everyday my body is still changing. I have started really focusing on my eating habits. September 1st starts my gym obsession again and I'm really excited for it. I had to put a date to it or I could put it off forever. I'm starting the couch to 5k for sh*ts and gigs. But I will also start my affair with the stationary bike and elliptical. They get real jealous if I don't give them attention. I work out for about 45 min. 30 min cardio. 15 min weight rotating different body parts throughout the week. It worked before I hope it will work again because well my body is just not the same.

I embrace this body because it's what got my son here safely and it is the body that one day will hope full bring me baby number 2. So I try to really be careful about saying I hate my body because well it has done me well so far. I did it before I can do it again and I will be so proud and happy when I meet my goal.

So any other momma's out there wishing away your squishy remember it got your baby here and it is all worth it when you see a smile from that bundle of drool and chunk.