7.15.2013

It won't be like this for long

I have been feeling lost lately... I don't know why
 like I can't give 100% to anything.
I'm exhausted and doing things I told myself I would never do (letting my baby boy sleep in my bed!!)
I feel like I have lost my identity and am only Grayson's mom.
Don't get me wrong that is a title that I'm oh so proud of and wanted for like ever, but it matters when dealing with my husband.
I need to be his wife first and his baby momma second not the other way around.
Work schedules are wearing on us aka having NO days off together.
I find myself day dreaming about getting things done around the house and then getting home and doing nothing.
This is where my head was this morning driving into work, when a song came on the radio. Darrius Rucker(yes Hootie) comes on the radio and it was like he was signing to me...."It won't be like this for long". I started crying and said out loud through sobs (yuppers I talk to myself) I'm making memories.
When I get home and neglect my floors, and laudry, and dishes.
I'm making memories with that oh so precious won't be squishy for long baby boy of mine.
This time next year he won't want me to hold him or sit still long enough for me to smother shower him with kisses. I neeeeeed to soak up all this time with him because Hootie said it best it really won't be like this for long.